Repentance

Last night I started reading the book Are We All God's Children by Bishop Macedo. Although I've only read a few pages and I haven't finished the book, there's something in there which caught my attention already and I just can't seem to shake it. He's talking about how Adam and Eve gave their authority to the devil through disobedience. Now, what got my attention is that he mentions that after committing their sin, after disobeying, instead of humbling themselves, going to God and asking for forgiveness, Adam and Eve chose to hide. After realising that they were naked, they chose to take weak, temporary fig leaves and hide their shame. And when God finally came looking for them, again instead of being humble and repenting, they started pointing fingers and shifting the blame.

Now, this raised two concerns within me. Firstly, had Adam and Eve rrepented, would the result have been different? Would God have forgiven them? I'm sure He would have. If they had just gone to Him and admitted their sin, would we still be in paradise today, having dominion over all creation as was the original intention? Of course, these questions are all quite pointless really, because the damage has been done. All we can do is live faithfully so that we can go back to the place that was created for us, instead of the place that was created for the devil and his demons. So I'll leave this matter at that.

The second, and much more relevant point, is how many people, even servants of God, act like Adam and Eve when they are caught in sin? How many people, instead of trully repenting and admitting their sins, choose to rather hide their sin? How many servants fool themselves everyday by living as hypocrites? How many servants fall into temptation and then, instead of going to their respective pastors and telling them, choose to hide because they fear losing their uniforms, along with their titles? How many servants out there are more afraid of the eyes of the people than they are of the eyes of the One who sees all?

For me, the fig leaves represent the lies that people tell to make excuses for their faults. I include myself in these group. And what we don't realise is it's all so futile, so useless, and yet so weakining and heavy. It's like if your roof is leaking, instead of fixing the roof, you keep putting bowls under the leaks. A temporary solution, weak and brittle. And tiring too. Most servants are more concerned about how people view them, their public image, instead of how God sees them. It's the reason why a number of assistants have become employees of the church instead of servants. They are more concerned with hiding their shame than with repentance. Or have I got the wrong end of the stick here?

Another thing is, why do we keep going back to the same sin? Look at any former servant, and you're likely to find that what made them fall was not something new that they came across. It's more likely to be something that they were never quite able to let go of. It's probably something which they repeatedly "repented" from, but went to it nonetheless. Is this normal, or is it lack of total repentance? I believe it's the latter. Most people never fully repent. They are never really sorry, for lack of a better word, for what they did. They just get on their knees, "My Jesus, forgive me, it was my flesh, wash me in your blood, in Jesus' name, Amen." Wham, bam, thank you ma'am. It's done, I'm forgiven, happy days. And then we forget. It becomes a routine, like a nursery rhyme. Have we become too "used" to God? Have we started treating Him like a school principal? This is probably why Solomon said the fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom.